When we are born in to this world, we do not speak words; we make sounds, grunts, cry and all types of expressions. The formation of our body and muscles are rapid. With each and every reaction our parents/guardians make to those sounds we made, we learn. As we develop we might make that same sound again to see if our guardians will react the same way. This is the formation of language from birth onward.
New born children feel our “energy” as its primal communication. Our bio-energy patterns speaks volumes to a new-born for it is a matter of primal survival.
If a parent is right there, sharing the excitement of their new love of their child, the child bathes in that love, even without words.
Feelings are the first language. If the parents is full of fear, the child also learns that as some of its first energy information.
If parents only react to crying, then we learn we must cry to get our needs met. If our parents react to our grunts, we make more grunts.
As an infant, we instinctively know we will die without our caregiver to help us, feed us and nurture us. The level of the parent’s attentiveness builds an infant’s self-awareness and self-expression. It is the building of their vocabulary and emotional dialog.
As toddlers, we start to make sounds, begin saying one or more words, moving towards sentences and expand our ability to communicate our needs. Throwing tantrums is a way to manipulate the parent to give in to needs we as a child might think is important at that moment.
Crying really tugs at our hearts, the energy language, and so it is hard for parents to stay conscious, and patient, to help the child express, and yet not reinforce habits of crying. It is time to help the child learn to talk.
A parent that gives in all the time actually will find more tantrums to follow as they taught their child this. Take time to observe what the child is experiencing and that information will help you in how to create positive growth.
Early childhood is a very fast growth period and it is a time when a parent can give their best attention and love as the child grows. This builds a firm foundation that allows the child to know, feel they are loved and nurtured which provides them with a feeling of being safe.
A parent that makes boundaries and does not give in, shows the child how far they can use tantrums to get their needs met.
A parent might take time to ask the child to express what they need through use of calm words, building the child’s skills of communication, and guiding them to start to use words to get their needs met.
This is a natural developmental growth period. Looking at your child eye to eye, with your heart full of love for them, tells them more than just your words. (does not mean they will like it, but it is the formation of an open communication that can last a lifetime)
A child will also use their energy field to reach out to their distracted caregiver if they cannot get the attention they need through sounds and words. They can form energy hooks and patterns that alert the caregiver without any sound. For when someone looks at another, their energy moves and touches them instantly in the form of Aka cords.
Science shows that toddlers can learn two languages easily, keeping the sounds of each language perfectly in two separate categories. They learn rapidly probably as part of our survival skills. Bio-energetic patterns are also formed very rapidly and can be culturally specific for their local.
If parents do not know how fast infants and toddlers learn, they might not offer the child healthy ways to grow. Being aware of the develpmentall stages, helps you to keep in fast pace during the childhood years.
Treating a toddler like an infant for a few more years teaches your child to act younger than their development stage which can be in the forms of crying or tantrums, “infant language”. Gently encourage your child to grow.
Now there are times a child will cry as they are feeling very disappointed. This is natural growth. Let them cry and sense their own emotions, for they have a whole life ahead of them where disappointment will be a natural occurrence.
Help them to know what emotions they are feeling. Talk with them. Let them know you love them, by “feeling love for them as they go through their growth”.
When they are telling you what is going on, give names to their different emotions in a neutral way. This helps them express themselves better as time goes forward.
No parent needs to ‘buy things’ for a child to quiet them. For the “thing” is energetically empty and thus gives the child no emotional support. Those children that tantrum for any/everything have just learned by the actions and words from the parents and caregivers that this is ‘how they get their needs met’. Yet the child will still feel empty over time and develop dysfunctional patterns.
A wise parent can say “no”, while still sending their love to their child so that the child understands energetically. These are important growth points. There are hidden energetic patterns that both the child and parents also develop during this time. Staying in a loving nurturing state of being, a parent can provide energy patterns that are healthy for their child.
For as we all know, children grow up fast. Soon they are having children of their own. The parenting years are extremely important by forming a healthy foundation for your child. Being calm and supportive in whatever emotional state your child is in helps the child to learn to be the same.
Children feel us all the time. They are connected to us through aka cords. They know if you and your mate are fighting behind the scenes as they can feel “a riff in the force”!
Saying something like “Oh he and I are arguing over something” is simple and true. The child can let go of the idea that they may be at fault,and also understand that there is a time and place for emotional conversations. It is all part of growing.
Being strong and communicate when the child needs to learn to act and behave differently. This will help both of you. How many times does a parent go to bed feeling a bit crazy as the child was just scolded, knowing nothing more.Each opportunity is for you to connect, energetically and with calm words that bridge understanding.
Be honest and open, sharing what the age and development level can handle, so they can also understand why sometimes parents are angry, or elated.
Parenting is the most difficult and the most important job in our world. There are no do-overs, and it is a work of the heart. Your energetic communication goes on and should match your actions and words. Something to think about.
I am a single parent, and just had to wing it from the heart, as what my parents did as parents was not appropriate for my child. I felt like more of a “tour guide” of how to be in the world, rather than some list of rights and wrongs. My adult son and I still share a wide open communication that we established when he was just an infant. He feels safe to talk to me about anything, and he will tell you that.
Sense your childs energy, what is he or she really trying to say. What hurts, what excites, what is really behind the words is more important than anything else. Empathy is a key; sensing energy language can open you up to their unspoken dialog.
~ Carolyn Thompson
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